This was a game that we knew from the start of the season would need to be rearranged. Arsenal were booked to play in the Intercontinental Cup when we were scheduled to play them, and we’ve now ended up in a situation where we have had Arsenal in 4th with 17 games played and the three above them all on 20 games. Arsenal needed a point from this game to end up in the Champions League places ahead of Manchester United, and United fans were already calling it a write-off.
Unsurprisingly, Arsenal won and they won big. A well deserved 7-0 loss at the Emirates didn’t even feel like a shock. Goals came from all across Arsenal’s front line, with Maanum, Holmberg and Blackstenius all looking like a different class of player to what we’re able to put out.
Emily van Egmond returned from injury to be fed into the meat grinder, alongside Asmita Ale. Shannon O’Brien started up top with the normal hit-and-hope set up in a 5-4-1. Arsenal played a slightly weakened side, but not in any real, meaningful way that gives us any chance of points.
Early on, O’Brien had the ball at her feet and, with no runners beyond, decided to pass back to the defence for them to whack it long to the no runners that O’Brien had just declined. It felt like it was going to be a very long night. After 15 minutes, there had been a few times that Arsenal almost managed to get Blackstenius in behind our back five. There was nothing overwhelmingly dangerous, but the inevitability of a goal meant that there was no tension built from these attempts for either set of fans.
The inevitable came along in the 25th minute and then again in the 27th. Much like the real experience of London buses, you don’t wait long, and there are two right away. And just like that, our minimal chance of getting anything from this game became nothing. Frida Maanum had a headed finish from just inside the box, and then two minutes later, Smilla Holmberg ran down the right wing and smashed the ball into the back of the net from the corner of the box. Two goals in two minutes and one sentence.
And then in the 40th minute, Blackstenius rose above our defence for another easy header from a nice cross to make it 3-0. Asmita Ale, again in her unfavoured centre back position, was playing her very much onside. We don’t have a wealth of options anywhere on the pitch, but pushing Ale into the middle of the defence has consistently led to her making the kind of mistakes central defenders don’t tend to make.
The fourth official put up the board up for 7 minutes of extra time. 7 more minutes of torture. And obviously, we let in another goal in this time as Maanum brought down a long ball from the Arsenal defence. Olivia Clark rushed out to meet her, and the ball ended up back with Blackstenius to score into an empty net. If this was a game of FIFA, your mate would rage quit by now. But this is professional football, so they did have to go out and play another half of football.
At half-time, Olivia Clark came off to be replaced by 19-year-old Katie Keane in goal for her first-ever WSL appearance. Arsenal bought on Alessia Russo and Mariona Caldentey, two of the best players in the game right now. Any hope that they might take their foot off the gas had gone with the wind. Within two minutes, Holmberg had scored another, arriving to tuck the ball in at the back post from an Olivia Smith cross. 5-0 already, and we had a whole half of football to play with a debutant in goal and morale that has dropped from North London down to Croydon. And nowhere is worse than Croydon.
50 minutes in and Arsenal brought on England captain Leah Williamson and Caitlin Foord. There was a bit just after this when we actually successfully defended an attack from Arsenal. The ball came into the box, and some of our defenders got it back out of the box. It felt like a very exotic and strange thing. Then Caldentey got the ball in some space just outside the area and leathered it into the net, leaving Leicester 6-0 down, and Katie Keane was now a goalkeeper who had conceded two goals within 10 minutes of her WSL career starting. Ale came off for Chantelle Swaby in a move that was sure to staunch the bleeding.
We went some minutes without a goal, and then Leah Williamson lost her marker and headed in easily from a corner. At that point, I found myself Googling what the biggest WSL win is. It was Arsenal 11-1 Bristol City in the 2019-20 season. So that became my new hope for this match: to lose by less than 10 goals.
With 20 minutes left, Alisha Lehmann and Emma Jansson came on, and then we had a now-standard fake goalkeeper injury tactical huddle. You have to wonder what Rick Passmoor could have possibly said. Was he telling them to keep it to no more than 9? Sit back and look to hit them on the break? I think the only possible motivation here is to tell them you’ve asked the ref for just a minute of added time.
Keane did pull off a few fantastic save towards the end of the game, and she certainly has potential. I would definitely like to see her in a game that isn’t a complete bloodbath, but I’m not a professional footballer – maybe this is character building? With 10 minutes left, it didn’t look like we would be part of a record loss. Noemie Mouchon almost scored an absolute banger after breaking down the right hand side and curling a shot towards goal.
If Sunday was a the final nail in the coffin, last night ‘Wind Beneath My Wings’ was played and we were pushed into the incinerator with the rest of the WSL watching on solemnly.
The Fosse Way 